F(*)(*)k ‘em Up Friday: Do it Yourself Edition

Fuck ‘em up Friday is a weekly post that occurs, you guessed it, every Friday. Bringing you some of the best knockouts, submissions, and knockers that exist out on the inter-webs. It’s basically my way of glorifying violence, as well as giving in to the urges of my pre-pubescent inner child. Yeah, that’s how I roll.

I know what you’re all thinking. “You don’t call. You don’t write. I just don’t know who you are anymore.” And while I haven’t been the best blogger/father figure to the readers here at So Much for College, I can say I’ve at least been busy posting over at The Gally Blog. It’s definitely worth a read and I’m not just talking about the stuff that I wrote.

I realize I’ve been away, but there is not a force in the world that could keep me away from posting a Fuck ‘em Up Friday…except maybe court, but last time I checked I didn’t have any outstanding arrest warrants.

To make up for my neglectful posting I’ll start with everyone’s favorite and my wife’s least favorite part of these posts…The knockers! But I must warn you. If you have any preexisting heart conditions or you’re prone to priaprism, I suggest you avert your gaze.

Okay, so possibly a Butter Face, but chances are you were probably looking at her tool belt and not her face. Moving on.

It takes a special type of person to fight in professional MMA. One who may or may not be missing a few screws. You’d have to since there’s always the risk of taking an untimely shot to the head as well as having a limb that you’ve grown accustomed to, like an arm, being ripped from its socket or its bones being snapped in half. Scientists have actually proven that the radius and ulna, the bones that make up the forearm, work much better when they don’t have a huge split down the middle. Who knew?

Now with that said it’s important to keep in mind that just about anything can happen in a MMA match from kimuras to head kicks to chokes to uppercuts. Anything and everything, with the exception of being attacked with steel chairs and flaming tables a la WWE style. That being said fighters train for almost every possible angle of attack to be better prepared for their opponent’s gameplan.

But how do they prepare for a scenario where they accidentally KO themselves?

I’ll let Mr. Black and Red patched hair demonstrate for you the proper way to knock yourself out, and you can use that as a guide for what not to do.

He had the right idea trying to slam his opponent. However, he didn’t really account for slamming his own head as well. That’s gotta suck.

Not gonna lie, that looked pretty painful, but I’m not sure it was that devastating where the guy had to be on the ground for so long after. I can’t tell if he was physically that hurt, or just embarrassed. Possibly a little of both. Who knows maybe for his next match he’ll perform a rear naked choke on himself, which would result in him passing out. I’m not sure logistically how that would work, but I’d like to see him or even somebody else try.