Fuck ‘em up Friday is a weekly post that occurs, you guessed it, every Friday. Bringing you some of the best knockouts, submissions, and knockers that exist out on the inter-webs. It’s basically my way of glorifying violence, as well as giving in to the urges of my pre-pubescent inner child. Yeah, that’s how I roll.
Sure by the time this gets posted it won’t actually be Friday. And sure being on vacation and consuming vast amounts of alcohol makes it real hard to be productive. But let’s try not to split hairs. Since I’m still coming off of vacation mode/alcohol withdrawal I will try to keep it short and sweet.
UFC 101 is this weekend. Which to say the least is going to be fucking awesome. I will be watching and so should you. No better way to spend your Saturday night than in front of your TV with your alcoholic beverage of choice in hand, watching grown men pummel the shit out of each other.
Legalized fighting means only one thing…Illegal gambling. What kind of degenerate gambler would I be if I didn’t share my picks for the fight? Obviously I would be a horrible human being and a terrible example to all those who follow through my bloodline. With that said I give you my picks for this weekend’s UFC 101 main card.
BJ “The Prodigy” Penn vs. Kenny “KenFlo” Florian – I have to go with BJ on this one. Sure he has been quite the whiny bitch since his loss to GSP a few months ago, “Waa GSP was all greased up. Waa I look like I could have been a teen aged mutant ninja turtle.” But crying aside I have a feeling he’s going to come back with a vengeance on Mr. KenFlo. Speaking of KenFlo. KenFlo? Really? Just out of principle I would pick against him every single time. You may not win the fight KenFlo, but you’ve certainly won the contest for worst nickname ever. Stupid nicknames aside I don’t see this fight making it past the 3rd round.
Anderson “The Spider” Silva vs. Forrest Griffin – The obvious and smart choice here is Anderson Silva. He’s undefeated in the Octagon, and hasn’t lost a fight since 2004. Griffin’s last fight resulted in a loss of the light heavyweight championship to Rashad Evans, a broken hand, and a depletion of whatever brain cells he had left in that neanderthal head of his. But just like that dog with the electric shock collar, who keeps trying to run out of the yard and continues to get shocked, Griffin will keep coming. And that counts for something, just not a win. Silva by knockout in the second round.
I should pick the winners for the 3 remaining fights, but quite honestly I could really care less who wins. Hey, at least I’m being honest…
And with that said, bring on the boobies.
I realize that the above video is supposed to serve as an “instructional” video, but all it really did was instruct my penis how to get into the “guard” position. Now if I could only coax my wife into the “full mount” position followed by her making me a sandwich. Then I would be a happy camper.
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Bold man throwing the wife comment in there while shes hormonal. Speaking of which how do you make a hormone? Dont pay her or stick it in her ass.
‘but all it really did was instruct my penis how to get into the “guard” position’. Ha, ha, that’s funny.